Honestly

Dear school

I wish I never knew you. You've brought me so much in my life time, you've given me everything I've desired from you. But today, I no longer wish to be apart of what you really are. The thoughts I've conceived under who you've been and the actions I've taken to dismay you are unforgivable. Don't forgive me, I don't wish to be with you any longer. The pressure you provide and the shades of gray you've become have greatly lessoned my appreciation for what you've given me. The way you are now is no longer what you were then. I no longer feel attached to you, much like most of my time with you, I often thought this behind your back. For many years you've put this unyielding pressure upon me. They say its healthy to exercise your mind, that may be true but it certainly never ever feels that way. The last time we had fun together was over a year ago and I can firmly say, I'm spent. I cannot handle the puns, the hypocrisy, the idiocy, the immature lectures, the talking down too. The feeling of acceptance only goes so far with you. After awhile, you begin to wear on people. Some cannot not handle your pressure and I am beginning to see why. Though to quit has never been what I do best. Although I want to beyond belief. I wish that we could have a break. I want so much to be away, I even think of cheating. As if I could quit you and and begin the relationship I want with my GED. The job I already have and the attitude I bare are enough to get me through more than you know. But you cannot see past this because you are as naive as when we first got together. You assume I have much to learn when in reality I have already learned as much as you have provided. You treat me as if I'm lesser than you to portray how transfixed you are with your self. You act as if I know less than you've already taught and for this I cannot forgive. I have seen the brighter side of you and I have seen the dark as well. But now, I wish to see the sky, for I am done with that umbrella you've been holding over me since we began this relationship. I want to grow passed you, I want to prove you wrong in every way. I hate you now, I hate what you represent and with my own words I will destroy you out of spite. I will show you how it feels to learn what I have learned and to learn again what you've taught me. I will cripple you and move on. I will begin my life anew and I will feel amazement for myself. I wish to be rid of you. I'm Sorry, for this relationship has come to a halt, you can no longer offer what I desire, for my selfish whims are too strong. I yearn for more than you could ever imagine and because of this I have already moved on. Right now I have just been waiting for a good time to stop you in your stride, so I could gently thank you for all you've done. During my thanking I will mention how immature you really are and how common you have become. I'll explain how you have not changed since the day we've met and as the tears stream down your smooth face I will tell you how much I've grown. I will hold your hand no longer, as if being led by a child to my doom. I will tell you to your face as you gasp for those little breaths of air, " I'm sorry but your not what I thought you were".

And I will move on. As you cry out for my soul. I will move on, just like the rest of them. I will be gone and you will have tainted another life with your greedy hands.

honestly and sincerely

Casey L. Jarrell