back to square one.

From Drop Box

My life looks so easy compared to those around me. So why does it seem like it's so hard.

I Wake up every day10 to 6 clocks fast.

I lean up, hit the snooze to make my night last.

I get up finally and debate upon breakfast before a shower.

I usually win.

By the time I get to class my life seems a little dumb down.

My mind seems a little bit slower than the day before it.

I listen to peoples problems and don't care about my own.

A hypocrite I have become.

Why? Because wanting to be something isn't enough .

I want to be a great person, one who influences people to do better.

Instead I yell with overbearing power while no one listens except me.

I can scream I can shout but nobody cares about seniority.

No respect because the words I speak are as common as flies.

Everybody's heard, it's the same thing over and over.

For me to scream at an individual for what I'm doing is disgusting.

Despicable, I am for being the hypocrite.

Disgusted at the way I try to prove myself.

I figure I should just stop, I don't know what drives me anymore.

By the time I get home I'm comforted by people who could care less and probably do.

No support backing me since I was 9.

I come home to an empty house filled with people.

Talk of nothingness and acts of shrewd justice..

It's like living alone knowing the life you have outside your home is the only life you enjoy.

No relaxation, no free time and when there is some I'm always doing something else.

Moving away wouldn't make much of a difference besides the fact that if I go down alone I'd have debt to pay.

Always negative, the principals my family has bestowed upon me.

Laziness, they never set good examples, I had to learn from spending the night friends.

I had to learn a lot and for what? To feel like this?

It's not right.

Nobody's right but anythings better than this.

I'm going to move away from here and not care what's behind me.

I'm going to be long gone so I can never speak to any of them.

So that they can never give my kids the negative thoughts they once gave me.

If they even live that long.

The laziness, death is a just outcome of this.

For if you don't care about yourself, how can you care about others.

Which is why, they don't care about me.

I'm alone when im at home, it's the most depressing place to me.

I wish I could be dedicated to something, I wish I could be a better person.

I wish I was never raised like this.

I see the smiles on peoples faces at school.

It brightens up my day.

To go back home, will always be the death of me as long as I pick up after these people.

I can no longer hide from my depression.

I know longer enjoy anything I use too, I do things because I'm told.

I can't delve into anything I use to enjoy.

I'm so sick of what I use to love to do and what I had a passion for.

It's like my spirit is gone.