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| From Drop Box |
Motivational, was I that pushed the team and never looked back
twas I to inspire a motif of learning curves to better you.
It was me who wanted you to grow to your utmost potential.
I saw it happen before my eyes and you, you all became better than expected
Erected were these people of great spirit and energy.
People who believed in themselves because others believed in them.
We were united thanks to my and our efforts as a whole.
I watched you guys grow right under me and over the top of me.
No longer in my shadow you all stand tall before me.
In my face not afraid to say anything.
But it's great to know your on my level and above and have seen what I go through.
Grateful to know that you have surpassed the lessons I can give.
Now all there is is repetition and with that comes the spirit to live.
I can't wait to see you all on your own.
Right now though, I'm having trouble with inspiration.
I seem no longer to have that motivation.
I walk when I could be running and my brain lags back to last week.
Thinking of nothingness, it's like starting anew on my first day.
Like starting again all over.
The first week hurts like hell I know but I didn't realize it would last forever.
Motivation is key and without my inspiration there is none.
I've got nothing to look forward too to complete my goals.
I've lost hope and drowned in my wows
dragging on the floor is my soul.
So out of shape from the the eagerness it use to receive.
So tired from the life it has to lead.
Every day I find something to not care about in a new way.
This anger that I have is dissipating.
I'm only waiting to let it go.
Through the views of myself I've learned so much.
Through this though I've learned that I'd rather not know.
I've lost it all in this mind I call Casey.
I've lost the ball as my mind starts to go crazy.
It's ridiculous how much people can hate, well that's not me.
My question is, “what's the point”?
Seriously now what's the point my dad lived his life and had me and from then on it was a downfall.
I was an accident like most of my generation but really looking at my dads life now and asking that question.
It's depressing, it's depressing because there is none. My dad could die and the only ones who'd care are his family.
We could all go to hell and the only ones who'd care are ourselves.
Our minds could fry and we could all become retarded and nobody would care.
Everybody in this world could disappear and nobody from any other would ever remember.
A man dies in a war, berried with his dog tags, they never knew his name.
No one cares.
I fight my heart out and have a whole team to back myself with and the inspiration isn't there.
It's just not there.
I could run a thousand miles with shin splints, nobody would care.
Could live to be a 100...
you get the idea.
What's the point?
I'm sick and tired of getting blamed for a lot of things.
I'm tired of dealing with every little thing.
I want to be out on my own and take care of my self and maybe one other person but not everybody else.
I want to live my life how I want to live it, but there's that question, “ what's the point”?
People mourn death every day, well they might as well mourn birth too because they're both inevitable.
Ridiculous is life and all it's shambles.
Every corner you turn, a punch in the face.
Every good dead you do doesn't matter.
Dog eat dog world.
Amazing how we all can even live our lives.
The thought of breathing in itself is, I don't know, everything that lives breathes, but whats the point of living.
I just don't know.
Living a lie just seems better than understanding the truth.
That's the world we live in.
that's the world I hate.
To live in such a cozy existence, it's not plausible, nothings plausible.
The world we live in is a sham.
We shouldn't exist, there's no point.
God help me, if I knew there was one I'd be able to believe in something other than this metaphorical way of life.
How could we all be so useless.
Or is it just me, the one who thinks of these petty ideas and preaches nothing of it.
Or is it I who can stand to be a hypocrite no longer.
I wish not to know the meaning of life for there would be no point.
I wish to find the meaning of mine.
Life.
Like my father, I love him so much but it seems the only reason he existed was to have me.
The reason I say this is because since I've left him, he's done nothing with himself.
He doesn't call, he doesn't care about himself, he just willows in the hatred at what use to be.
That is why I asked the question, “what's the point”?
My worst fear is that I will become like him.
Sad, sorry, and a wallowing lump on society.
I wish not to be him, for he has nothing he wouldn't wish for.
Everybody around me, some have it better, others have it worse.
I just don't see the point.
I've lost that sparkle in my eye.
To myself I am nothingness.
I am a shadow of what was once a child with a purpose, but now, there is nothing.
For I will forever be the paper you write on
when you think of something familiar to me, my name is not what comes to mind.
I am the background of which your favorite characters run upon.
I am the desk you sit at every day.
The cup holder you use without thought.
I am the one that never comes to mind.
A ghost.
I do not haunt you, i don't disturb.
I just watch this world as it turns itself inward.
It's hard when you know what you want to do, but know that you don't have the freedom to do it.
It just makes you question.
I wish I was better than what I am because it feels like nobodie believes in me.
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